The road leading up to the library will be lined in American and Corporate Flags; kind of like going to a NASCAR Race. Of course you will need a passport to get in. While technically it is Texas, they wouldn’t want any illegals in there.
First stop once inside and past the metal detectors will be the shredding of the Constitution Room. Visitors will be able to use shredders to scrap up ample amounts of yellowed parchment pages of rights and amendments as well as use black magic markers for blackening out Time and Newsweek magazines, which suddenly got classified as top secret. And who won’t want to miss getting a picture of yourself in an actual seat from Congress which it is humored to have never have been sat in during the eight years Dubya was President!
We won’t want to miss our stop in the Guantanamo Room where we can be held indefinitely with out rhyme nor reason while FBI officials strip search each and every member of our family. Might be too much for Grandma though; could remind her to of the time she flew to
Indianapolis and got strip searched while going to the Knitters convention. I told her not to take her needles!
There will of course be the Condi Rice Room where you can actually sit at a piano and hear the same song being played over an over again while a video behind you shows her getting on and off of a 757 and you get to try and guess the country she is in! What fun. And lest we forget the Basement Bunker room of the VP with its two way mirrors and non stop Fox television news feed complete with cardiac monitoring equipment from Mattel!
Can’t miss Rummy’s Room in the attic either where you get a full 360 degree view of the grounds with binocular telescopes pointed in all directions and for a small donation to, “Friends of Fair Media Reporting,” have your picture taken with a stuffed dummy of Shawn Hannity! Be a great location to get picture of the full-scale Oil Tanker in the back yard donated by Exxon as well
And finally as we drive away from the Library we will have to make a stop at, Cindy Sheehan Hot Wings for Warriors Fried Chicken Stand, for snacks and photos of the President on a bicycle.
What a day, and to think the whole place will be built with funds from grateful Halliburton and Enron employees who set aside money from their pension funds out of gratitude for a job well done!